To be envious is a feeling of limiting belief, that we are somehow inadequate. I don’t think it means that you don’t like yourself or don’t appreciate life. It is a feeling when we have an area in our life where we are insecure (imposter syndrome).
Perhaps we wonder why others have more friends, more likes on Instagram, or why do people in the office don’t like you as well as they do others. Maybe you are questioning Jlow or Shakera’s performance at the Superbowl halftime show.
Over time this can lead to distractive behavior and we lose sight of our achievements or the goals we set out of ourselves. What I don’t want for you is feeling when we see others succeeding that we have lost our chance. NOT TRUE!! There is enough light for all of us to shine.
It is common for most of us to have these feelings of envy to want what others have. I certainly have had these feelings in the past. However, I have come up with ways to stay positive when other lives look perfect.
Five ways to stay positive when other lives look perfect
1. Focus on a Higher being. Put more time in meditating, reading, praying, or worshiping. Put into perspective that I am more than myself, we are here for a higher purpose.
2. Don’t feel bad for my success- often when people around me are envious, or I feel resentful about others- I should focus on the progress I have accomplished.. Guilt around feeling accomplished is a limiting belief. I also know this is not of God and move past it. (not today Satan, not today). Don’t worry about being envious of others or them of you, pay attention and celebrate YOUR achievements
3. Be yourself, your socially brave self-confident self. By focusing on being your true self, it creates a way to focus on positive energy and ignore other behaviors.
When we are our true selves, we have peace.
4. Ignore or block individuals from social media and everyday life. If you must interact, keep conversations simple. Do not share success or achievements. In other words, don’t go deep in discussions.
5. Don’t think you can shower negative people with a positive affirmation, and it changes them. This helps keep you in a positive mindset. In my experience that the relationships within are the primary focus in growth.
Be kind and Grace others in; however, to change their behavior would require them to work on themselves. They will do this in their time, not ours.
Difference between Jealousy and Envy
We are human, doing the best we can to live when at the end of the day, we are proud. As a side note, I wanted to go over the difference between Jealousy and Envy.
Jealousy is when you feel someone has something or achieved something you think belongs to you. In social media, you think you deserve the followers more than others because of your content it better.
Envy is when someone has a car you would like, or they have great hair, and you wish you had it. Perhaps in social media, they have lots of followers that you wish you had. You want these things, but don’t feel you should have it over other individuals.
Being Socially Brave is knowing we have flaws; sometimes, we are envious. We should be open to working through the fear of growing to self-actualization. We are Socially Brave.